Parent Tricks That Work For Me

Partly I am blogging this for my own sake and partly in hopes that you all will share what really works for you. I am not talking what the experts say enough of that, I mean like real life advice. I know I struggle with consistency, or lack of. God bless those women who don't. Routine makes me sick. Just the other day the thought of one more peanut butter sandwich on whole wheat bread, literally brought tears to my eyes. I opened the fridge and my head collapsed in the crook of my elbow as I was leaning on the freezer and I cried, I am not joking. (Wow sidetracked) Sorry consistency rocks but I prefer the lure of the unknown, like "ohhhhhh what are we having for lunch today?, Indian curried rice? hummus? enchiladas?" yesssssss! But PB and J is much easier to whip up so for the last 5 years we used more peanut butter than I could have ever imagined. (We ended up by the way having tuna).

Okay on with the show,
What is working for me right now parenting kids close in age.

When they get into a fight, and one hits the other and the other hits back, instead of a big lecture, I simply say, "both of you are wrong, I am going to punish both of you, or you can take care of it for yourselves." they opt for the latter (self preservation) and quickly make up. After all of that I say, "okay now you have to make each other laugh" this works because they get to put on a show and be silly, (you will need to moderate this as the word "fart" and "poop" are guaranteed to cause much inappropriate laughter. One hundred percent of the time they are happy as can be and resume playing like nothing happened. The bible says not to get into silly arguments, the whole "she hit me first" etc. doesn't fly. If they both hit they are both wrong end of story. We don't even discuss it. They know that and don't argue it.

So as not to appear as a know it all, I will add what doesn't work for me.

Letting the kids play hide and seek with the cordless phone to keep them occupied while I am on the other phone talking to the bank. ( Offical rules of this game are, brother hides the cordless phone from sister, mom pushes page button and both kids run like crazy through the house to find it) That doesn't work because when the chicken roasting in the oven is sizzling out of control and you really need to switch to the cordless phone so you can not only talk to the lady at the bank but stop an oil fire..., well you get the picture, it doesn't work.

What Happens at the Grocery Store Does Not Stay at the Grocery Store

Well if you have ever in your life taken three or more kids to the grocery store, no need to explain the above picture. If you haven't then let me tell you, don't. This is the food my kids "bought" while I wasn't looking.

Now not to disclude parents of one child or two this has happened to me at every stage and with every child, (Julia your not going to get out of this!)

The first time was with my oldest, he was 3. I found a giant pomegranate candle and a huge bag of beef jerky. You can imagine my surprise when I was putting groceries away. A joyful Mason claimed them and told me he "bought" the candle for me. I looked at the receipt and the jerky alone was 15 dollars!!

Now Abby has done this too, she "bought" a pack of "pies" (smuckers uncrustable peanut butter sandwiches)

But today for the first time they both had a hand in the shopping and you may ask "How could you not notice?" my answer to you is, well I don't have an answer. I have a theory, bear with me.

Abby going in and out of the cart, taking her shoes on and off, sitting down in the middle of the isle to do so. (would not let me help her)

Mason hanging on the cart, off the cart, under the cart on the side of the cart. (no I don't allow this so hence the 15 shopping disruptions)

Judah in my purse, putting a toy in taking it out, whining all the way, he didn't actually "shop" but I think his part in the little plan was distracting me.

Come to think of it, I vaguely remember scanning a box of juice, but for the rest, seriously I don't even know how it got to my cart. The kids "helped" me load the items on the conveyor belt and after that it was history. Free and clear. We don't even eat Rice a Ronni.!!